Sunday, January 02, 2005 like the noble llama, only smaller
New Year's Eve I was back In Richmond. There was a party, and that was OK. I burned my thumb a little, but maybe I shouldn't have been lighting off fireworks anyway. I hadn't planned to, but I was outside, and someone asked "Would you like to set off this firecracker?" I looked inside my heart, and the answer was "Damn yes", so I followed my heart, and injuries were minimal. Hellooo ought-five.
I was a little disappointed: there was no countdown at midnight. I'm not sure the old year officially ended at all.
After the party, some friends and I went out to Nowheresville County, where a friend was farm-sitting. I spent the first few hours of ought-five standing in a field, trying to convince some alpacas to come and be petted. When they came near me, it was hard not to scream: alpacas are shaped in a way that I'm not used to animals being shaped, and in the middle of the night at the beginning of a new year, when you (or I--I don't think you were there) are a little drunk and shivering, alpacas move like the awful little girl in The Ring, but larger, with long snaky necks and sinister heads.
In the daylight, it turned out that alpacas have big beautiful eyes and soft fluffy coats. It also turns out that when they're upset, they spit.
I'd known this on an intellectual level. I hadn't realized, though, how easy it is to upset an alpaca. If you get a handful of grain and start feeding it to one alpaca, that makes it pleased and happy, but all the others around it become jealous, and then they pin back their ears, cock back their heads, and spit something green and foul all over one's face.
Not my face, though. After the first member of our party got spit on, I backed away and let the alpacas fend for themselves.
Happy New Year.
posted by Frenzy Lohan | 1/02/2005 11:08:00 PM
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